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dearprongs:

seduce me with lots of amazing headcanons about my otp

daemonrolling:

Hetatexts
Me & My Dad telling My Step Mom I'm Gay
Step Mom: Our Server was checking you out, Haley.
Me: Uh, that's nice.
Step Mom: What, you don't think he's cute?
Dad: She's Gay Tammy.
(Awkward Silence)
Step-Mom: Well whats so good about eating Pussy?
Me: Excu-
Dad: Tammy, my daughter is gay. She eats Pussy; Yes, but it's not just about eating Pussy. She loves the Pussy, she admires the Pussy, she tends to the Pussy, she moves inside the Pussy . . . She is one with the Pussy, because, my daughter is Gay . . . She loves the Pussy.
(Longest Awkward Silence Ever)
Me: You said Pussy like 5 times . . .
Dad: 8 times Hunny, now finish your Burger.

mindfang:

never make fun of someones anxiety never make fun of someones anxiety never make fun of someones anxiety never make fun of someones anxiety never make fun of someones anxiety never make fun of someones anxiety never make fun of someones anxiety never make fun of someones anxiety never make fun of someones anxiety never make fun of someones anxiety never make fun of someones anxiety

yaosnonexistentmanhood:

how can people hate ivan i dont understand

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i mean

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just look at this little babu

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how can you hate that chubby face

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how can you hate that smile

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how can you hate that handsome face

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how

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how

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how

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the-awesome-adventurer:

the-awesome-adventurer:

the-awesome-adventurer:

I think the snapchats of my math teacher are the only thing I’ll be remembered for and I’m okay with that

I got suspended, Thursday school, and moved to an entirely different classroom because of this post.

I JUST FOUND OUT THEY BANNED SNAPCHAT ON MY SCHOOLS SERVER BECAUSE OF THIS OMFG

kurwah:

kurwah:

DOES ANYBODY HA VE THE PICTURE OF THAT REA LLY BAD EDWARD ELRIC W IG WITH THE WOR DS “PROFESSIONAL ONLY” WRITTEN ON IT

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